Showing posts with label my weird kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my weird kids. Show all posts
Monday, February 1, 2010
I See Your Naked Body!
This (meaning the blog post title) is what Mateo yelled all around the mall today. Which is funny to a three year old. A three year old who is very curious about bodies, nakedness, and potty language. Three year olds are also known for NOT stopping when you tell them to. If fact, this particular three year old tends to say inappropriate things longer and louder when you tell him not to. So, in combination, this can be quite embarrassing. And now everyone in the mall thinks my son would like to see their naked bodies.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Worms and Christmas Trees
I know what you're thinking - how do worms and Christmas trees go together? Well, this is how.
Mateo is obsessed with worms. He can find one on a hot sunny day. I don't know how but he hunts them down and finds them. He'd make a good bird I guess. Anyway, he digs them up then tortures them for the whole time he's playing outside. He would bring them into bed with him at night if I'd let him. But the rule is that worms stay outside. So he carries them around, puts them in his cars, covers them with rocks, feeds them to the dog, gives them lobotomies, and so on. Well, he had about a hundred in a bucket one rainy day and it was time to come inside. We asked him where he would like to put his worms for the night. We have a small pine tree right next to our patio that's about the size of a Christmas tree. Mateo decided this would be a good home for the worms. So he throws them, one by one, onto the branches of the tree. Guess what the tree ended up looking like? A Christmas tree decorated with tinsel. Worm tinsel.
'Tis the season!
Mateo and his bucket of worms
Maybe you, too, have Christmas decorations in your own backyard!
Bonus photo cause it's so darn cute. And too bad I can't post pics of the baby yet cause I have one of her with these same sunglasses on! And yes, we wear our sunglasses at night.
Mateo is obsessed with worms. He can find one on a hot sunny day. I don't know how but he hunts them down and finds them. He'd make a good bird I guess. Anyway, he digs them up then tortures them for the whole time he's playing outside. He would bring them into bed with him at night if I'd let him. But the rule is that worms stay outside. So he carries them around, puts them in his cars, covers them with rocks, feeds them to the dog, gives them lobotomies, and so on. Well, he had about a hundred in a bucket one rainy day and it was time to come inside. We asked him where he would like to put his worms for the night. We have a small pine tree right next to our patio that's about the size of a Christmas tree. Mateo decided this would be a good home for the worms. So he throws them, one by one, onto the branches of the tree. Guess what the tree ended up looking like? A Christmas tree decorated with tinsel. Worm tinsel.
'Tis the season!
Mateo and his bucket of worms
Maybe you, too, have Christmas decorations in your own backyard!
Bonus photo cause it's so darn cute. And too bad I can't post pics of the baby yet cause I have one of her with these same sunglasses on! And yes, we wear our sunglasses at night.Sunday, September 6, 2009
Stealing? Already?!
Mateo pulled an unfamiliar toy car out of his backpack yesterday. Neither Dave nor I could recognize where it came from. So we asked Mateo.
Me: Where did you get that car?
Mateo: Preschool.
Me: Preschool? Did you take it home from preschool in your backpack?
Mateo: Yes.
Me: Well you can't do that. That doesn't belong to you, it has to stay at school. We'll bring it back on Tuesday.
Mateo: Ha, ha, tricked you!
Me: You tricked me? You mean you didn't take it from preschool?
Mateo: Yeah, preschool.
Dave: You mean you tricked the teachers at preschool to take the car?
Mateo: Yeah.
So from what I can gather from the conversation is that Mateo tricked the teachers by hiding the toy car in his backpack so that he could take it home. Great. So we've got a klepto on our hands. Maybe they need to install metal detectors. Or search Mateo everyday before he leaves the building.
Me: Where did you get that car?
Mateo: Preschool.
Me: Preschool? Did you take it home from preschool in your backpack?
Mateo: Yes.
Me: Well you can't do that. That doesn't belong to you, it has to stay at school. We'll bring it back on Tuesday.
Mateo: Ha, ha, tricked you!
Me: You tricked me? You mean you didn't take it from preschool?
Mateo: Yeah, preschool.
Dave: You mean you tricked the teachers at preschool to take the car?
Mateo: Yeah.
So from what I can gather from the conversation is that Mateo tricked the teachers by hiding the toy car in his backpack so that he could take it home. Great. So we've got a klepto on our hands. Maybe they need to install metal detectors. Or search Mateo everyday before he leaves the building.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
My Little Gymnast.....Or Not.
So Mateo seems to have a natural ability towards gymnastic-type moves. He can do a cartwheel and a split, which he learned on his own. And of course, he is very energetic. So I thought signing him up for a little gymnastics class would be good for him as an outlet and to harness some of his energy into something productive. So we signed up for a trial week that meets everyday this week for an hour in the morning. It was pretty cheap and I thought it would give me a good idea about his ability.
We lasted a class and a half. And now our gymnastic career is over. At least for another year or so. Who knows? This kid is so set on doing his own thing he just couldn't function in the class. I don't know if it's so much that he can't or that he won't. Yesterday was his first day and he was very enthusiastic about all the activities. The problem was that he had trouble waiting his turn and his attention span got the better of him. This is what the class sounded like.
"Mateo. Mateo, no. Come here. Over here Mateo. Mateo, come sit right here."
The whole time. More so than all the other kids combined. And the instructors said specifically they didn't want the parents to intervene because they want the children to learn to listen to the teachers. So I didn't intervene. But I couldn't help but feel like my kid was ruining their class, and probably driving them crazy. But Mateo was really great at the activities. It's hard to believe he ever had a gross motor delay. Aside from some balance issues, he was really good at everything. After the class I was excited about his potential. I also thought he would only get better as the week went on and he learned the structure of the program.
Well, today we left early. And we don't plan on going back. He didn't get better. He got significantly worse. I decided it's just not worth it if I'm going to have to chase him around the gym telling him to listen to the teacher the whole time. So we're gonna wait another year or so and try again.
But it was fun to watch him when he was doing the activities. The rest of the time was pretty funny. The whole class would be sitting on a mat getting ready for the next activity and there's Mateo about 20 feet away rolling around on the mat, or hopping around like a frog. That didn't bother me so much, it was kind of cute. But when he kept using the other equipment he wasn't supposed to, or taking another child's turn and being disruptive, that's when I had to intervene. And the fact that he wasn't listening to me or the teachers, just wasn't okay. So we left. And he didn't seem to care. He just wanted his juice box I promised him after class.
I'll post some videos I took as soon as I get a chance.
We lasted a class and a half. And now our gymnastic career is over. At least for another year or so. Who knows? This kid is so set on doing his own thing he just couldn't function in the class. I don't know if it's so much that he can't or that he won't. Yesterday was his first day and he was very enthusiastic about all the activities. The problem was that he had trouble waiting his turn and his attention span got the better of him. This is what the class sounded like.
"Mateo. Mateo, no. Come here. Over here Mateo. Mateo, come sit right here."
The whole time. More so than all the other kids combined. And the instructors said specifically they didn't want the parents to intervene because they want the children to learn to listen to the teachers. So I didn't intervene. But I couldn't help but feel like my kid was ruining their class, and probably driving them crazy. But Mateo was really great at the activities. It's hard to believe he ever had a gross motor delay. Aside from some balance issues, he was really good at everything. After the class I was excited about his potential. I also thought he would only get better as the week went on and he learned the structure of the program.
Well, today we left early. And we don't plan on going back. He didn't get better. He got significantly worse. I decided it's just not worth it if I'm going to have to chase him around the gym telling him to listen to the teacher the whole time. So we're gonna wait another year or so and try again.
But it was fun to watch him when he was doing the activities. The rest of the time was pretty funny. The whole class would be sitting on a mat getting ready for the next activity and there's Mateo about 20 feet away rolling around on the mat, or hopping around like a frog. That didn't bother me so much, it was kind of cute. But when he kept using the other equipment he wasn't supposed to, or taking another child's turn and being disruptive, that's when I had to intervene. And the fact that he wasn't listening to me or the teachers, just wasn't okay. So we left. And he didn't seem to care. He just wanted his juice box I promised him after class.
I'll post some videos I took as soon as I get a chance.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Daily Schedule My A**!
I've read on a couple different blogs now, a daily schedule for the children, mostly related to homeschooling. But as I was reading, I couldn't help but laugh at the idea of it all. So I've written my own parallel schedule of my day with Mateo. I'm just mentioning Mateo in this schedule, since he's the funny one. Keep in mind, this is a bad day. He does have days that go better than this. But I thought I'd show the full realm of how bad it could be.
6:30 am - Mateo comes in Mommy's bedroom, I put him back in his. 1st attempt at wake up time.
7:00 am - 2nd attempt at wake up time.
7:24 am - 3rd attempt at wake up time. I finally give in and drag my butt out of bed.
7:25 am- Mateo demands in an increasingly loud voice that he would like breakfast ASAP. As in now!
7:27 - Mateo eats oatmeal. I try to get a bra and some deodorant on.
7:30 - Mateo demands more breakfast. Mommy says wait (still working on the bra step) and Mateo screams.
7:31 - Mommy tells Mateo he can have more breakfast when he asks nicely.
7:32 - Mateo throws his spoon across the room.
Let's just skip ahead a little...
7:55 - Breakfast is done. Noggin is on TV. Mateo is playing with cars. Mommy starts count down for Mateo to get dressed.
8:00 - Warning #1
8:05 - Warning #2
8:06 - Warning #3
8:07 - Mommy tells Mateo it's time to get dressed. Mateo runs away.
8:09 - Mommy chases Mateo then proceeds to wrestle him into his clothes using various threats and bribes.
8:30 - Play time!
8:32 - Mateo whines for juice and to eat again.
8:33- Mommy asks Mateo to wait until snack time for juice and to eat, Mateo begins explosive tantrum.
8:34 - Mommy contemplates the pros and cons of giving in to juice and a snack or holding my ground for him to wait until later. Mommy makes decision to negotiate.
8:36 - Mommy asks Mateo if he would like some water or milk now while waiting until snack time. Mateo doesn't negotiate, cue larger tantrum.
9:00 - After numerous attempts at distraction, negotiation, and calming techniques, Mateo has hit/bit/scratched/thrown toy/etc. and ended up in a time-out.
9:15 - After Mateo stops calling names, spitting, and screaming at the top of his lungs in time-out, he apologizes to Mommy and is let free.
9:17 - Mateo asks for juice and to eat. Mommy sighs, looks at the clock, and realizes it's snack time anyway.
9:20 - Snack. Mommy attempts to get dressed, brush teeth, contacts in, etc. Then discovers Mateo has fingerpainting/mashed/squished his snack on himself, the table, and the floor.
9:30 - Snack time over.
9:32 - Mommy collapses on the couch after realizing it's only 9:30 in the morning.
9:40 - We decide (meaning Mateo) to go outside and play. Commence act of putting on shoes.
10:05 - We finally go outside.
10:15 - Mateo's powerwheels truck is not charged (Mommy silently curses Daddy for that one), Mateo flips out. He calls the truck "stupid" multiple times, then flips it over upside down.
10:20 - We go inside because Mateo just can't get over it. Use TV as a distraction until we can move on.
10:45 - Mommy suggests play-dough. This goes well.
11:00 - Until Mateo wants something specific to work with the play-dough that just doesn't and he gets frustrated.
11:10 - Play-dough away with much drama.
11:30 - Lunch! Mateo eats exactly nothing, even though he states he is hungry over and over.
To be continued...
6:30 am - Mateo comes in Mommy's bedroom, I put him back in his. 1st attempt at wake up time.
7:00 am - 2nd attempt at wake up time.
7:24 am - 3rd attempt at wake up time. I finally give in and drag my butt out of bed.
7:25 am- Mateo demands in an increasingly loud voice that he would like breakfast ASAP. As in now!
7:27 - Mateo eats oatmeal. I try to get a bra and some deodorant on.
7:30 - Mateo demands more breakfast. Mommy says wait (still working on the bra step) and Mateo screams.
7:31 - Mommy tells Mateo he can have more breakfast when he asks nicely.
7:32 - Mateo throws his spoon across the room.
Let's just skip ahead a little...
7:55 - Breakfast is done. Noggin is on TV. Mateo is playing with cars. Mommy starts count down for Mateo to get dressed.
8:00 - Warning #1
8:05 - Warning #2
8:06 - Warning #3
8:07 - Mommy tells Mateo it's time to get dressed. Mateo runs away.
8:09 - Mommy chases Mateo then proceeds to wrestle him into his clothes using various threats and bribes.
8:30 - Play time!
8:32 - Mateo whines for juice and to eat again.
8:33- Mommy asks Mateo to wait until snack time for juice and to eat, Mateo begins explosive tantrum.
8:34 - Mommy contemplates the pros and cons of giving in to juice and a snack or holding my ground for him to wait until later. Mommy makes decision to negotiate.
8:36 - Mommy asks Mateo if he would like some water or milk now while waiting until snack time. Mateo doesn't negotiate, cue larger tantrum.
9:00 - After numerous attempts at distraction, negotiation, and calming techniques, Mateo has hit/bit/scratched/thrown toy/etc. and ended up in a time-out.
9:15 - After Mateo stops calling names, spitting, and screaming at the top of his lungs in time-out, he apologizes to Mommy and is let free.
9:17 - Mateo asks for juice and to eat. Mommy sighs, looks at the clock, and realizes it's snack time anyway.
9:20 - Snack. Mommy attempts to get dressed, brush teeth, contacts in, etc. Then discovers Mateo has fingerpainting/mashed/squished his snack on himself, the table, and the floor.
9:30 - Snack time over.
9:32 - Mommy collapses on the couch after realizing it's only 9:30 in the morning.
9:40 - We decide (meaning Mateo) to go outside and play. Commence act of putting on shoes.
10:05 - We finally go outside.
10:15 - Mateo's powerwheels truck is not charged (Mommy silently curses Daddy for that one), Mateo flips out. He calls the truck "stupid" multiple times, then flips it over upside down.
10:20 - We go inside because Mateo just can't get over it. Use TV as a distraction until we can move on.
10:45 - Mommy suggests play-dough. This goes well.
11:00 - Until Mateo wants something specific to work with the play-dough that just doesn't and he gets frustrated.
11:10 - Play-dough away with much drama.
11:30 - Lunch! Mateo eats exactly nothing, even though he states he is hungry over and over.
To be continued...
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Things That Make You Say Hmm...
We just got back from a mini-vacay to New Hampshire for some hiking, swimming, shopping, and train rides. And I just wanted to high light a few things that happened that just make me want to say hmm... or, more accurately, why would you do that?!
- Mateo was waiting outside while I changed Maya in the dressing room at the beach and as people walked by, he would whack them with his pool noodle. Hmm...
- While ordering pizza and waiting to collect it and pay, Mateo was walking up and down the line licking the bar that you slide your tray on. Hmm...
- When I went to fill our drinks at the fountain and stock up on napkins and utensils, Mateo emptied the entire contents of the salt and pepper shakers onto the table. Hmm...
- We were outside of the condo enjoying the nice mountain air and Mateo tried to open the door to someone else's condo and when it was locked, he knocked and yelled to open up. Hmm...
I also decided, per this trip, that Mateo may have sugar running through his veins instead of blood. My huband's friend, Terry (who lives in Hawaii and came with us since we don't see him much), tried to tire Mateo out one day. We went on a short hike, almost a mile, to a cascading waterfall where we climbed up a steep hill to swim in some of the pools (it was really cool, I'll post pictures later). Terry and Mateo ran the whole way there. Then he proceeded to climb up the hill, around on the rocks, swim in the water (somewhat because it was really cold) and then climb back down. Then Terry, thinking he would really get him this time, ran Mateo all the way back to the parking lot, one mile. Dave and I took our time walking with the baby (who was on my back) and when we got to the parking lot, there was Terry looking completely amazed, and Mateo, still running, back and forth across the trail. The whole adventure was about two hours and Mateo didn't slow down for a minute. You see? He must have sugar in there or something.
But really, Mateo was SUPER hyper this weekend. One of my theories is that perhaps because we stopped doing the therapeutic listening for the vacation, that had some effect on his ability to be calm. I don't know. Just a theory. I just hope things go back to "normal", meaning periods of extreme hyperactivity and just some hyperactivity in between, instead of extreme hyperactivity ALL DAY LONG. I just don't think I could take it anymore. Well, thank God for daycare.
- Mateo was waiting outside while I changed Maya in the dressing room at the beach and as people walked by, he would whack them with his pool noodle. Hmm...
- While ordering pizza and waiting to collect it and pay, Mateo was walking up and down the line licking the bar that you slide your tray on. Hmm...
- When I went to fill our drinks at the fountain and stock up on napkins and utensils, Mateo emptied the entire contents of the salt and pepper shakers onto the table. Hmm...
- We were outside of the condo enjoying the nice mountain air and Mateo tried to open the door to someone else's condo and when it was locked, he knocked and yelled to open up. Hmm...
I also decided, per this trip, that Mateo may have sugar running through his veins instead of blood. My huband's friend, Terry (who lives in Hawaii and came with us since we don't see him much), tried to tire Mateo out one day. We went on a short hike, almost a mile, to a cascading waterfall where we climbed up a steep hill to swim in some of the pools (it was really cool, I'll post pictures later). Terry and Mateo ran the whole way there. Then he proceeded to climb up the hill, around on the rocks, swim in the water (somewhat because it was really cold) and then climb back down. Then Terry, thinking he would really get him this time, ran Mateo all the way back to the parking lot, one mile. Dave and I took our time walking with the baby (who was on my back) and when we got to the parking lot, there was Terry looking completely amazed, and Mateo, still running, back and forth across the trail. The whole adventure was about two hours and Mateo didn't slow down for a minute. You see? He must have sugar in there or something.
But really, Mateo was SUPER hyper this weekend. One of my theories is that perhaps because we stopped doing the therapeutic listening for the vacation, that had some effect on his ability to be calm. I don't know. Just a theory. I just hope things go back to "normal", meaning periods of extreme hyperactivity and just some hyperactivity in between, instead of extreme hyperactivity ALL DAY LONG. I just don't think I could take it anymore. Well, thank God for daycare.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
And So it Begins...
Mateo has discovered his penis. As in, he knows it's called a penis and is obsessed with other people who may or may not have penises (or is it penisei?). He has not said the word "vagina" yet but I did tell him that girls have one instead of a penis. So it's coming. And so it begins....(dum dum dum).
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Mateo-isms
- "Wuh-jew" = Love you.
- "Wuh-jew my Daddy me" = (I think) I love Daddy
- "Ugh! Tupids truck! Tupids truck no work!" = Stupid truck! Stupid truck doesn't work!
- "But Mommy, Cowie Wuh-jew me" = Cowie loves me (when asked to leave Cowie in the car for preschool)
- "Daddy miss me" = (I think he means) I miss Daddy
- "Mommy, me jump! Me cool!"
- "Mommy pitty" = Mommy pretty (he says this anytime I fix my hair or wear a dress. I think Daddy taught him that)
- "No Heeca cun im" = I don't want Luca (our dog) to come in my bedroom (that one was obvious, right?)
- "Mommy pain butt!" = Mommy's a pain in the butt! (I have no idea where he got that from)
- "Iyant hitty bankek on me" = I want the little blanket on me
- "Mommy, harps, harps!" = Mommy, sharp, sharp! (warning me when using a knife)
- "No hipperies!" = (when scared of walking on icy or wet surfaces) No slippery!
- "Mor-gain" = Again (a mixture of more and again)
- "No bye-bye me" = Don't leave me
When asked do something, most of the time he says, "Uhhh...no." Very matter of fact. It's quite funny and a little annoying since he's clearly beyond doing me small favors.
Mateo and his Daddy on the jet ski this weekend in New Hampshire (I have more pictures to put up from this weekend later)
A boy, a dog, and water gun. Nothing beats it.
(The dog is my mom's, by the way)
- "Wuh-jew my Daddy me" = (I think) I love Daddy
- "Ugh! Tupids truck! Tupids truck no work!" = Stupid truck! Stupid truck doesn't work!
- "But Mommy, Cowie Wuh-jew me" = Cowie loves me (when asked to leave Cowie in the car for preschool)
- "Daddy miss me" = (I think he means) I miss Daddy
- "Mommy, me jump! Me cool!"
- "Mommy pitty" = Mommy pretty (he says this anytime I fix my hair or wear a dress. I think Daddy taught him that)
- "No Heeca cun im" = I don't want Luca (our dog) to come in my bedroom (that one was obvious, right?)
- "Mommy pain butt!" = Mommy's a pain in the butt! (I have no idea where he got that from)
- "Iyant hitty bankek on me" = I want the little blanket on me
- "Mommy, harps, harps!" = Mommy, sharp, sharp! (warning me when using a knife)
- "No hipperies!" = (when scared of walking on icy or wet surfaces) No slippery!
- "Mor-gain" = Again (a mixture of more and again)
- "No bye-bye me" = Don't leave me
When asked do something, most of the time he says, "Uhhh...no." Very matter of fact. It's quite funny and a little annoying since he's clearly beyond doing me small favors.
Mateo and his Daddy on the jet ski this weekend in New Hampshire (I have more pictures to put up from this weekend later)
A boy, a dog, and water gun. Nothing beats it.(The dog is my mom's, by the way)
Monday, July 6, 2009
My Name is What? Take Two.
The 3 year doctor's visit.
If you know us, you know Mateo has MAJOR issues remembering, reciting, recalling, whatever you want to call it, his name. Well, enter doctor.
"What's your name?"
"Cowie."
"How old are you?"
"Too much."
Then the nurse came in with some kind of test (not sure what it's supposed to determine) consisting of black outlines of shapes and pictures. The nurse pointed to each one and asked Mateo what it was.
Circle. "Cracker"
Square. "Cookie"
Heart. "Pie."
House. "Mommy's house."
Now I suppose the right answer would be to name the different shapes, but Mateo decided to take a more abstract, symbolic approach to the test. I think he was hungry.
We went on a mini-vacay this weekend and I have some really cute pics to post. Which I will do sometime this week. Man, it's hard to blog with two kids. I don't know how some of you mega-family people do it.
If you know us, you know Mateo has MAJOR issues remembering, reciting, recalling, whatever you want to call it, his name. Well, enter doctor.
"What's your name?"
"Cowie."
"How old are you?"
"Too much."
Then the nurse came in with some kind of test (not sure what it's supposed to determine) consisting of black outlines of shapes and pictures. The nurse pointed to each one and asked Mateo what it was.
Circle. "Cracker"
Square. "Cookie"
Heart. "Pie."
House. "Mommy's house."
Now I suppose the right answer would be to name the different shapes, but Mateo decided to take a more abstract, symbolic approach to the test. I think he was hungry.
We went on a mini-vacay this weekend and I have some really cute pics to post. Which I will do sometime this week. Man, it's hard to blog with two kids. I don't know how some of you mega-family people do it.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Conversations with Three Year Old's Are Always Interesting (but sometimes also disturbing)
A little while after getting in trouble for poking Maya's eyes, this conversation transpired.
Me: Mateo, do we poke babies eyes?
Mateo: No. (thoughtful pause) Mommy, I poke Terry (daycare provider).
Me: You poked Terry?
Mateo: Yes.
Me: Oh. (Not really sure what else to say)
Mateo: I poke Kayleigh (child at daycare).
Me: (skeptically) Oooookay.
Mateo: Mommy, I wanna poke Kayleigh.
Me: Well, Kayleigh might not like to be poked. Just like the baby doesn't like to be poked. It's generally not a good idea to poke people.
Mateo: Mommy, I wanna poke cars. I wanna poke car's eyes.
Me: Okay. You can poke car's eyes. You can even poke Cowie's eyes. Just not the baby.
Mateo: Okay.
Me: Okay.
Weird.
Me: Mateo, do we poke babies eyes?
Mateo: No. (thoughtful pause) Mommy, I poke Terry (daycare provider).
Me: You poked Terry?
Mateo: Yes.
Me: Oh. (Not really sure what else to say)
Mateo: I poke Kayleigh (child at daycare).
Me: (skeptically) Oooookay.
Mateo: Mommy, I wanna poke Kayleigh.
Me: Well, Kayleigh might not like to be poked. Just like the baby doesn't like to be poked. It's generally not a good idea to poke people.
Mateo: Mommy, I wanna poke cars. I wanna poke car's eyes.
Me: Okay. You can poke car's eyes. You can even poke Cowie's eyes. Just not the baby.
Mateo: Okay.
Me: Okay.
Weird.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
I took the kids to the mall cause it was a rainy day and Mateo needed to burn off some energy (we have a very small house). The bad day started on the way back. We got a new double stroller and this was my first time trying to get it back into the trunk of the car. First off, it was a bitch to fold up. Then it wouldn't fit in the car. I was in the mall parking lot for at least five minutes trying to maneuver it this way and that, the baby was in the car seat screaming her head off, Mateo is yelling for juice, and I have never wanted to drop the F-bomb so badly in all my life. Which, by the way, I am not a big swearer at all, so that was kind of a big deal, especially when I jammed my finger folding the dang thing up.
So when I got home, Mateo was sleeping so I put him down for a nap. Our dog, Luca, usually stays outside when we leave the house, but it was raining so I locked her in the playroom like I always do. When I went to let her out, I noticed that she pooped. But not like an ordinary dog would poop on the floor or under a table or something. No, my dog had to poop on top of Mateo's train table. Seriously, have you ever known a dog to scale furniture to take a dump? Ridiculous. I was so pissed and disgusted I ended up calling Dave on the phone to complain about the whole thing. Then I cleaned it up with some paper towels and as I was carrying it to the bathroom, it fell out of the towels onto my bare foot. Gross. So, even more pissed, I washed my foot then went back to the train table to clean the rest up. But there were little pieces stuck in the track that I just couldn't get out. So, I had to wait till it dried up, then suck it out with the vacuum extension. I know it's gross but I feel I have to give you the full extent of what I went through (woe is me!).
So, during all this, I thought Mateo had gone back to sleep in his room. But no, instead, he emptied all his drawers all over the floor and made a huge mess. I felt a little bad cause I yelled at him and said, "Mommy is NOT messing around today!" But he eventually fell asleep. Right in time for the baby to wake up and poop all over herself (gotta love when it gets all the way down to their socks). I was so done with poop that day.
So when I got home, Mateo was sleeping so I put him down for a nap. Our dog, Luca, usually stays outside when we leave the house, but it was raining so I locked her in the playroom like I always do. When I went to let her out, I noticed that she pooped. But not like an ordinary dog would poop on the floor or under a table or something. No, my dog had to poop on top of Mateo's train table. Seriously, have you ever known a dog to scale furniture to take a dump? Ridiculous. I was so pissed and disgusted I ended up calling Dave on the phone to complain about the whole thing. Then I cleaned it up with some paper towels and as I was carrying it to the bathroom, it fell out of the towels onto my bare foot. Gross. So, even more pissed, I washed my foot then went back to the train table to clean the rest up. But there were little pieces stuck in the track that I just couldn't get out. So, I had to wait till it dried up, then suck it out with the vacuum extension. I know it's gross but I feel I have to give you the full extent of what I went through (woe is me!).
So, during all this, I thought Mateo had gone back to sleep in his room. But no, instead, he emptied all his drawers all over the floor and made a huge mess. I felt a little bad cause I yelled at him and said, "Mommy is NOT messing around today!" But he eventually fell asleep. Right in time for the baby to wake up and poop all over herself (gotta love when it gets all the way down to their socks). I was so done with poop that day.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Stupid Butt Head
My son called the baby a "stupid butt head" today. Gotta love daycare. Well, it's days like these I'm sort of glad most people can't understand him. And on the bright side, at least he's using his words to express how he feels about the baby, instead of his fists.
Monday, May 18, 2009
My Weird Kids
Weird kid traits:
Kid #1 rocks himself (violently) to sleep every night.
Kid #2 must be moving at all times in order to sleep. Which means she sleeps in a swing, set on high, all. night. long.
Kid #1 feels he must be the loudest thing in the room at all times, out-noising the vacuum, the baby crying, and the dog barking.
Kid #2 screams in the car unless the windows are open, the music blasting, and the car is either driving a minimum of 70 mph or going over speed bumps. Note to self: invest in hydrolics.
Kid #1 has a fit if even a drop of liquid spills on his clothing during a meal yet he freely runs through the sprinkler or hose fully clothed and could care less.
Kid #2 would have gnawed my finger off by now if she had teeth.
I love 'em. But I'm just sayin'.
Kid #1 rocks himself (violently) to sleep every night.
Kid #2 must be moving at all times in order to sleep. Which means she sleeps in a swing, set on high, all. night. long.
Kid #1 feels he must be the loudest thing in the room at all times, out-noising the vacuum, the baby crying, and the dog barking.
Kid #2 screams in the car unless the windows are open, the music blasting, and the car is either driving a minimum of 70 mph or going over speed bumps. Note to self: invest in hydrolics.
Kid #1 has a fit if even a drop of liquid spills on his clothing during a meal yet he freely runs through the sprinkler or hose fully clothed and could care less.
Kid #2 would have gnawed my finger off by now if she had teeth.
I love 'em. But I'm just sayin'.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Car Crashes and Back Aches
Mateo: Mommy, my have boo-boo. (points to small scratch on arm)
Me: Uh-oh. Are you ok?
Mateo: Yes.
Me: What happened?
Mateo: Car crash.
Next day
Mateo: Uh-oh. Daddy boo-boo. (points to small dot on nose)
Dave: Yes, I have a very small boo-boo, but I'm ok.
Mateo: Car crash Daddy?
Apparently everyone with a boo-boo has been in a car crash. Which means he's been in about a hundred.
Saturday
Dave: Mateo will you hand me that rock please? (working outside building a patio)
Mateo: Mine back hurts. Need break. (sits on step and drinks juice)
Must be from all the car crashes.
Me: Uh-oh. Are you ok?
Mateo: Yes.
Me: What happened?
Mateo: Car crash.
Next day
Mateo: Uh-oh. Daddy boo-boo. (points to small dot on nose)
Dave: Yes, I have a very small boo-boo, but I'm ok.
Mateo: Car crash Daddy?
Apparently everyone with a boo-boo has been in a car crash. Which means he's been in about a hundred.
Saturday
Dave: Mateo will you hand me that rock please? (working outside building a patio)
Mateo: Mine back hurts. Need break. (sits on step and drinks juice)
Must be from all the car crashes.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Eating Disorders for Fatty McGee
We've given the girl a bit of a complex by calling her "chubbers", "fatty", and "chunky monkey" that now she's decided to be bulimic. It's true. She is spitting up after every meal. It's okay honey. There's nothing wrong with being curvy. Some boys like a little junk in the trunk. Maybe we should tone down our nicknames and start doing self-esteem exercises.
****I don't want to make anyone nervous about the baby's health. I'm just being funny but we are taking the problem seriously. We are not negligent parents that ignore the important health signs that something is wrong. We already have her signed up for an eating disorder clinic.
****Okay, all kidding aside. She is going to the doctor this afternoon to get on reflux meds.
****I don't want to make anyone nervous about the baby's health. I'm just being funny but we are taking the problem seriously. We are not negligent parents that ignore the important health signs that something is wrong. We already have her signed up for an eating disorder clinic.
****Okay, all kidding aside. She is going to the doctor this afternoon to get on reflux meds.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Poopy Head
My son called the baby a poopy head. I have no idea where he learned that word. I blame daycare.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Talking in Our Sleep
Turns out Mateo and I have something in common. Well, other than being loud, bossy, and having an opinion on just about everything. We both talk in our sleep. I haven't in a really long time, but every couple months or so, I start jabbering away, mostly unintelligible murmuring. So a couple nights ago, I apparently said, clear as day,
Suckety suck suck suck!
Dave, who wasn't quite asleep yet, started cracking up laughing. I woke up and said, "Did I just say that out loud?" And he started laughing again. But in my head, I was saying that metaphors are a sucky way of describe a sucky situation (I have no idea why I was talking about metaphors, I swear I have the strangest dreams). So I drift back to sleep saying, "Metaphors. No, metaphors suck. I don't like them," with Dave still laughing in the background.
Apparently I hate metaphors.
But Mateo has started talking, or maybe I should say making sound effects, in his sleep. Ever since the Indiana Jones Stunt Show in Disney, he's been obsessed with things blowing up. This isn't made better by my husband who shows him hundreds of videos on youtube.com of explosions of different sorts. Now we hear him in the middle of nap or as he's falling asleep at night making all sorts of explosion sounds. On the good side, he may actually have a future in sound effects. He sounds pretty convincing to me.
Suckety suck suck suck!
Dave, who wasn't quite asleep yet, started cracking up laughing. I woke up and said, "Did I just say that out loud?" And he started laughing again. But in my head, I was saying that metaphors are a sucky way of describe a sucky situation (I have no idea why I was talking about metaphors, I swear I have the strangest dreams). So I drift back to sleep saying, "Metaphors. No, metaphors suck. I don't like them," with Dave still laughing in the background.
Apparently I hate metaphors.
But Mateo has started talking, or maybe I should say making sound effects, in his sleep. Ever since the Indiana Jones Stunt Show in Disney, he's been obsessed with things blowing up. This isn't made better by my husband who shows him hundreds of videos on youtube.com of explosions of different sorts. Now we hear him in the middle of nap or as he's falling asleep at night making all sorts of explosion sounds. On the good side, he may actually have a future in sound effects. He sounds pretty convincing to me.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Why is it Always About Potty?
After telling Mateo all morning we were going to make Easter eggs today, and after buying all the materials to do so, I asked him, "Mateo, what are we making today?"
No response. So I give him a little hint.
"We're making....Easter...."
"Potty!"
I swear this kid is obsessed with potty.
Anyway, here are some pictures of our Easter potty- I mean eggs.
He was quite proud of himself.
No response. So I give him a little hint.
"We're making....Easter...."
"Potty!"
I swear this kid is obsessed with potty.
Anyway, here are some pictures of our Easter potty- I mean eggs.
He was quite proud of himself.Saturday, March 7, 2009
My Name is What? ....My Name is What?
So Mateo's expressive language is booming, but receptively he's falling behind. He can imitate almost any word or short phrase, but he doesn't answer questions very well, even easy ones that he should know. We've been trying to teach him to answer when someone asks his name. So far, we've had a slew of ridiculous responses. Some garbled sounds, sometimes he just says "no", and sometimes he makes up words. But here are the usual answers he gives us.
"Mateo, what's your name?" (as if that isn't a dead giveaway)
"Bobby." (Don't ask)
Try again.
"Mateo, what's your name?"
"Applejuice."
Later.
"Mateo, how old are you?"
"Nnnnnnnooooooo.....!!!!"
Try again.
"Mateo, how old are you?"
"Applejuice."
Sigh. Any suggestions? We're meeting next week with the special ed coordinator for his transition to preschool and we've already made a....how shall I say...."interesting" impression on this woman once. See this post for the details. And then this one for the follow up story. Although Mateo is not going to that preschool (for reasons in the posts linked above), we are trying to get speech services from them. So I suppose it is in our favor that he doesn't know his name. All the more reason to give him free speech therapy, right?
Oh, but did I mention, he can say, "Oh crap!" clear as a bell. Isn't that wonderful? Well, I suppose it could be worse.
"Mateo, what's your name?" (as if that isn't a dead giveaway)
"Bobby." (Don't ask)
Try again.
"Mateo, what's your name?"
"Applejuice."
Later.
"Mateo, how old are you?"
"Nnnnnnnooooooo.....!!!!"
Try again.
"Mateo, how old are you?"
"Applejuice."
Sigh. Any suggestions? We're meeting next week with the special ed coordinator for his transition to preschool and we've already made a....how shall I say...."interesting" impression on this woman once. See this post for the details. And then this one for the follow up story. Although Mateo is not going to that preschool (for reasons in the posts linked above), we are trying to get speech services from them. So I suppose it is in our favor that he doesn't know his name. All the more reason to give him free speech therapy, right?
Oh, but did I mention, he can say, "Oh crap!" clear as a bell. Isn't that wonderful? Well, I suppose it could be worse.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Obama or Lion King?
I've written several times about the challenges and joys of raising children in multi-racial families. Mainly, through trans-racial adoption. While I feel pretty incompetent in this area, I continue to strive to do my best. One thing that I love to do is collect multiracial and multicultural children's books. I highlighted my two most recent purchases in my MLK Jr. post a couple weeks ago. "Big Words" about Martin Luther King and "Barack Obama, Son of Promise, Child of Hope".
Well, we've hounded Obama's face into Mateo so many times that now he thinks every black man is Obama. Including Martin Luther King Jr., who's book we read every week. He calls him Obama. And Obama, Obama. And any other black male character, Obama.
I tried to tell Mateo that Martin Luther King Jr. was not Obama, but Martin Luther King Jr. just seemed like a mouthful for Mateo to be able to say. Especially considering he can't even say his own name. So, I've been calling him Dr.King. Which Mateo has now translated to Lion King.
So now every black male is either Obama or Lion King.
Am I doing something wrong here?
Well, we've hounded Obama's face into Mateo so many times that now he thinks every black man is Obama. Including Martin Luther King Jr., who's book we read every week. He calls him Obama. And Obama, Obama. And any other black male character, Obama.
I tried to tell Mateo that Martin Luther King Jr. was not Obama, but Martin Luther King Jr. just seemed like a mouthful for Mateo to be able to say. Especially considering he can't even say his own name. So, I've been calling him Dr.King. Which Mateo has now translated to Lion King.
So now every black male is either Obama or Lion King.
Am I doing something wrong here?
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